by Katrin Bentley
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Average Customer Review:
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
 Truthful but kind, 2008-05-24
The author does an excellent job of communicating the difficulty of an AS marriage. The title is wonderful and says it all. She does a good job of explaining the frustrations of everyday life, but is very kind and understanding when speaking of her husband even when he is verbally abusive to her. There was somehow a comfort in reading about the feelings and frustrations that I experience daily. It was like I have a friend who understands completely what I am going through and is sharing her similar story with me. I highly recommend the book.
4 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
 What about her needs?, 2008-05-06
My heart bled for this woman, over and over. Why is it so many loving, sensitive women get in relationships with men with Asperger's? Aspie men are brilliant at presenting themselves as charming, intelligent, slightly shy or aloof and we flock to them like bees to honey- feeling that we are the ones who can rescue and bring them out of their lonely shells. I do understand much about Asperger's, and have great compassion, yet why is it that she stays in this marriage that keeps her constantly working so hard to keep him from getting upset or on overload? How could she stay after, "The Girlfriend"? She doesn't touch on a subject that is an issue in many Aspie/NT marriages and that is lying by the Asperger's partner, specifically in relation to infidelity. She begins to touch upon this in "The Girlfriend" chapter, but seems satisfied that Gavin once and for all learned his lesson. I somehow doubt it. Fooling other women who don't know them as well as we do can be addictive to husband's with Asperger's. They don't have to get that disapproving, disappointed vibe that we wives naturally give off after being hurt, lied to, let down countless times.
I think this women has begun to love her prison; and has lost her sense of self.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
Thankyou, 2008-04-21
I recently purchased this book as I suspect my husband has AS. It has been very informative in helping me communicate in a more successful manner and improve our relationship. I am still not sure if AS is applicable to my situation as I am still on the road to discovery. Any assistance is great.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
Lifesaver / Marriage Saver, 2008-04-07
I am married to an Aspie. I've read many books on this subject. So far, this one is helping *me* with my marriage. The other books helped me to understand the Aspie, but this one is helping me with my reactions to him. This book is written in layman's terms, and in story form which makes it easy for me to understand. I recommend this book highly.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
This can bring a fresh start to an old relationship, 2008-03-11
This book is written in a very relaxing and easy to read style, I do not think this is only for Asperger diagnosed people, but for everyone, since all of us show aspergians characteristics once in a while, specially when we are under a lot of stress, so the key is having open communication so we can understand why the other person did what he or she did, rather than walking away without having all the information. One of the key characteristics that I have taken away from this book is that Aspergian behavior seems to be triggered when we act out on our feelings without putting any bounderies or controls over them, then a balance is broken and people get hurt, however, understanding that some people do not know how to build those boundaries or limits can be the key to re-establishing an old relationship in new and fresh ways through teaching, practicing and lots of patience, lots of it, but the end result is all worth it, since we are all human beeings and we like each other's company although we may not know how to express it. Great book.
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